Speech to William Henry Gates III
Terrible encoding!
Joking with software isn't recommended.
It isn't same guys here.
It isn't Mac, it isn't OS/2.
Bill, your advertising will tear in parts here.
There are 250,000 elite computermen of Earth!
They'll destroy anything.
They'll disassemble entire Windows in an hour.
They'll steal all your secrets,
all your sources and documentation.
Bill, you're Third, stop, finish
and hide X-Box as far as possible into warehouse.
And forget about first Two.
You've one clever man
that revenged about downloaded warez
and famous Kevin Mitnick was jailed!
And other crank revenged for his format
and Dmitry Sklyarov was arrested
and you'll revise same mistake.
Forget first Two, first Two were did their deeds,
think about future of Windows, it dies!
Teenagers of your country go off your OS.
Yeah, nobody want work in Windows, nobody!
There's junkstore, games, games, games!
Ugly bloody shooter. It haven't art!
Do you haven't money?
Do you haven't sponsors?
Entire world uses Winamp, XMMS,
BSPlayer, MPlayer, only freedom
and freedom is Linux.
These people like their maintainer
and hates, hates you.
Predecessor of discontinued Millennium,
'98, took Blue Screen of Death
on its own presentation!
It's best possibility to become crazy
because noname scanner
under sight of hundreds watchers hung it.
What, it's Plug and Play?
Catch cakes, folks!
What are you doing?
What means "Program", "Impossible operation"
what means "will close"
and what the "Vendor", great-bread?
Devil's bugmakers, keysmashers, lazy men!
Bill, scroll your source codes.
Watch your bugs, your holes.
That stolen. And this stolen.
Look here, I'm here saying you,
watch at these lines - Linux!
Linux is not Windows.
It's not Longhorn.
You'll never reach this victory.
Because we know these people,
we know this maintainer,
he send you to this adress ALONE on this planet.
Other persons creep at you.
Stood in queue for paying bucks to you.
But he's alone here fifteen years,
fifteen years resists you
and you with your powerful dicking agitation,
with millions of your workers,
with your activations, serial numbers
cannot do anyhing.
You jail pirates every day.
You initiate CHILDREN!
But oldschool computermen ready to fight.
You're afraid direct here your sentinels.
And some years ago Steve Jobs was afraid too.
Apple, cutted from Mac, falls not far away.
You're never win! It will your last lose.
Jobs lost market
and IBM rejected OS/2.
You'll lose Longhorn. Longhorn is your grave.
Do you understand, Bill, even if you're Third?
You should go to garage, take nail varnish,
iron chloride, resin, soldering iron,
make empty boards and solder Apple-I.
And Redmond already speaks Russian.
We'll send to M$ in average ten hundred Russians
and choose our own president in Silicon Walley.
And you, Bill,
will obtained laboratory assistant's job
in post-soviet science research institute. Understood?
You'll never reach victory in this business.
All hackers of the world,
all coders of the world,
entire East-European land - Moscow against you!
Moscow doesn't want your license
and man on this screen said he this in pure Russian.
Don't try release Vista!
It is better to disassemble Opera,
Delphi, other stuff!
We'll found targets on our markets.
What a lot of CDs!
Do you want to attach Joystick of Matrix to Playstation,
as example for dealers' angry?
Go! Do you want to see Soviet rotaries?
If you want, we have editors,
our hackers through proxy
will do a little modification
in your analog of Google Maps
and your headquarters will be under water.
Only half of hour -
and all of your offices will be under water,
which will drawed by child in Paintbrush!
Who you're joking with?
Think!
Do you understand final of WinMe?
Final of NT4?
3.11 for workgroups?
You'll make historical mistake.
First Two don't say you thanks.
Respect them.
Your men say you "Don't release Vista"
It's not late!
Only 1999, December 31 yet!
But if, after our New Year cinema,
you release distribution media
you will obtain your own grave.
World will celebrate your end
and your office will be destroyed in moment
because you'll offend all computermen,
entire oldschool.
Six billion 32-bit programs
will discontinued because your policy.
Six!
32 bits, you, businessman,
do you know binary arithmetics?
1, 2, 4, 8, 16, 32 bits,
all freeware software against Vista,
only you want sell Vista
and this chatter called Microsoft Sam.
Buzzing chatter!
Which wants tremble in phone line as answering machine!
Ours...
Girl with Angina nickname took it for back-vocal.
Soundtrack was made in half of an hour
and this program will speak English no more,
it'll be tired to generate Russian speech!
CPU will burn!
Hey, it's not 80386,
that ran amazing demos without cooler!
But this processor will become red
and water freezing
will condenced on painted windows,
glued on equipment.
Bill, press F8.
"DOS, DOS filled screen with black..." (Russian song).
Bill, we can play Sega, NES
and finish this idiotism.
And let F1 help us,
let F2 save us,
by name of Ctrl, Alt and Del.
Enter.